Niki wrote this comment in response to the Media Acceptance of Natural Hair post. I have been thinking about the acceptance of natural hair a lot lately and Niki's comment solidified my decision to do this post (rant really). She said, "I'm proud to see us taking the plunge, " and she's so right.
Firstly, let us outline some of the characteristics of natural hair. Among many other characteristics, natural hair is:
- Kinky, coils or curly that shrinks.
- frizzy.
- big.
- puffy, very often assuming a cottony appearance.
- thick.
- sometimes exhibiting sheen but not extremely shiny or "slick".
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| A puffy, slightly frizzy twist-out. |
Knowledge of those characteristics led me to ask the following questions. If we truly accept our natural hair, shouldn't we accept our natural look.
- So what if my hair is big?
- So what if my twist-out is puffy?
- So what if my hair looks like cotton?
- So what if my hair isn't stretched out and shrinks to my head instead?
- So what if my hair doesn't show it's "true" or really, straight length when it isn't blow-dried or stretched.
- So what if my hair is NATURAL?
So, this is my question, are you truly accepting of natural hair? Am I wayyy off base? lol. Am I wrong to love wearing my puffy afro or twist-out?
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I think this post is so relevant and necessary. Even when I view natural hair care blogs, I notice often that a lot of the models featured have a certain look and their hair a certain texture. I also struggled with feeling confidently beautiful in my natural state. Any naturalista with locs knows all about twisting that front row to make sure your hair is laid down nice and slick. Luckily, I'm over that stage and love my kinky and curly and NAPPY edges LOL. However, I must admit, when it comes to work or a business meeting, I'd rather go for the slick look. Does this mean that I'm not proud or that I don't feel beautiful in my natural state? I think that we have a long way to go... I've been natural for 10 plus years now and people still say to me, "Your hair looks pretty for it to be natural." So pretty hair and natural hair can't by one and the same?
ReplyDeleteWhat an excellent post!
ReplyDeleteI do love natural hair, but it is a process that takes time. I am the only person with natural hair in my entire family. I did the big chop last year and started using more natural products to keep my hair healthy and happy and to encourage growth.
I love all hair textures, but really kinky and nappy is my favorite although my curls aren't that kinky.
Loving natural hair is also about accepting ourselves and knowing who we are, our potential and where we come from. Whenever you meet someone who knows who they are, 9/10 of the time they have their natural hair and/or a headwrap on. it just takes time.
When I first chopped off my hair, everyone in my family freaked out. Now it's grown longer and is much healthier, but all they see is a 'nappy' head. On the rare occasions that I do press/flat iron my hair, they try talking me into keeping it that way or not to wear a scarf/headwrap outside. They even try talking me into getting a perm!
But yes, I love nappy/kinky/curly natural hair and it is much more versatile. Also, I want to thank you for having such a wonderful blog that I can read and learn about hair and be inspired by my beautiful sisters!
Goddess Ashayt – Awww. You're so welcome Goddess Ashayt. I hope you maintain the strength to keep doing what works for you.
ReplyDeleteJanelle – You already know I agree with you. lol. I'm still considering the locs. Time to do a post on that too. lol.
Hello! I'm glad that you've taken this topic further, because I know that acceptance goes beyond the big chop.
ReplyDeleteAs the two other commenters mentioned, even though our hair may be natural, we still try to make it 'act' like non-natural hair - lay down, stay down, smooth and shiny - which means we still have a way to go in comprehending the nature of our hair.
We may have come to terms with how our natural hair looks, but we still have to get accustomed to the fact that it is a completely different from other textures of hair. As a result, it reacts differently and requires different care.
We need to understand that this is a relationship - you meet your natural hair, you're enamored with it, but then familiarity breeds contempt and you long for all your follicles to stay put! If we're serious about getting to know our natural-hair selves, it will take time, just as real relationships do; and I'm learning every day, trying to be patient when it gets on my nerves lol.
I agree with you re naturals being concerned about "definition, shrinkage, growing it waist-length, etc." I saw a lot of that on Moptop Maven and it gets to be sickening. She has a bi-racial daughter and I just get the impression that she's trying to keep up with the daughter's texture...shockingly sad and I'm sure she'd be the first to say not true but that's my observation/opinion.
ReplyDeleteI had a relative tell me that my hair made him want to speak to me in African. I just look at him in awe. I was not sure what to say or how to feel. here this man of color would look and a women of color and make a statement like that!! What I heard was you should look more european, it made me said!!
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